My life?: 10/10

Friday, October 15, 2010

when theres nothing left to be done or said,

its best to just end things.

cause no matter how hard I try to tell or express myself

you don't care and continue being selfish!

thats who you are and you will never change.

END of everything we've been through.

screw you!

I don't have a reason to hold on

Nov 1

Sometimes, its better not to think about how I feel and just focus on work. Maybe it's time to push away any sort of feelings and be immune to emotions for a while. I know I might turn out to be this cold-hearted person, but maybe it might bring me more benefits.
I know no matter how many people care and worry for me, it's my part to play if I want to feel better. I can't depend on people to cheer me up, can't expect much from people.If I want something, I got to pull myself together and do it myself! I'm upset, but its only for me to decide whether I want to move on with life or allow myself to be upset.

Maybe one day, I might forgive you. But it won't be anytime soon. =(

oh the bitchyness!

Oct 31

Oh, don't expect me to give a damm about you!
You fickle-minded person!

DECIDE!

Don't tell me one thing and do another the next!
Who do you think you are?
You're on the verge of slipping out of my "ok" list.
Don't play with fire, boy cause it ain't gonna be pretty.

Don't trigger my bitchy mode cause I doubt you would ever want to encounter it!

i can tell you I'm alright, I can look happy, but am I really that?

Recently, I have been either annoyed or feeling down. It has been a very rough week for me (with exams and extreme stress levels to cope with). Yet, when I feel like sitting down to talk to someone about it, nothing is able to come out. I don't want to share because I'm afraid of being judged. Sometimes, when I allow myself to think about it and tell someone, I tend to judge myself in the end. I feel bothered by something, I know it; but I haven't allowed myself to think about it.

And tonight, I did, I feel down. I only have one question, "why?" I just want that to be answered. :(

Theres no place for me to vent my sadness anymore :(
I don't want to remember anything that has happened this semester. I just can't wait to fly back home where I can finally forget things and be happy. I am holding on to this holiday! I promise myself to be a different person.I don't want to remember anything that has happened this semester. I just can't wait to fly back home where I can finally forget things and be happy. I am holding on to this holiday! I promise myself to be a different person.
One thing I learnt in life, don't care about things too much. It'll eventually eat you up inside if things backfires and turns out to be the exact opposite.

good night. one paper left to go.

thank for nothing!

you're back to who you used to be
AND I HATE IT!

When I finally had enough of your nonsense..

Why do i even bother having arguments with you when I know for sure that you're going to bring up the past again and ruin everything! you can never stop having heated arguments with me. Maybe we really are two different people from two very different worlds. You never bothered to understand me from the start. Yeah, you probably should have continued dating that girl. Regretting now?

If you liked her so much, then why bother me? Sometimes, when you try to argue your case, you know that you are in the wrong and yet because of your ego, you can never admit it. Why? Because you don't want to admit it's your fault when clearly it is. Then, all you ever know how to do is bring up the past and try and accuse. How mature of you. really!

Do you not know that i had a very bad day? Isn't it enough that I am already upset? Why do you always have to go and upset me knowing what I have gone through.

Now, i give up.

I am leaving things up to you to decide for yourself but one thing I know for sure. I will not turn back anymore and accept your apology for the don't know how many millionth time. Enough is enough. You choose to go your way, I choose mine. I have had it with you and your nonsense.

Now, goodbye!

I'm afraid to allow anyone to hold my hands and be apart of my life because of the pain I've been through. It scares me to even know that sooner or later this person is going to be the same and hurt me. Then I'll have to slowly piece back my broken heart again by trying EVEN HARDER to be a stronger person.

sometimes, it's better to be alone than to be hurt by being with someone.

=( good night.

the hurt,pain won't go away..

I wish you knew how this feels like. Waiting and waiting and waiting all night long, hoping to see that grey icon turn green.

Why can others care about me so much and you can't when you say you love me? I don't understand.
I did everything I could for you before, sacrificed so much time and effort to do ANYTHING you wanted me to do and now, you can't even do one small thing to make me happy.

=( You hurt me. you make me sad. and here I am still hoping and waiting for you to come online to talk to me.

Maybe when you said you love me, it's not true. Maybe you say it to others as well, thats why they reply "love you" in return.

Thanks once again for hurting me and for making me understand why people give up on love.

Why do you have to push me to this point? Am I not unhappy enough for you?
Every day I try a little harder to be stronger.
I'm starting to turn emotionless.
My heart is slowly turning into stone.
I am slowly giving up on guys and even love.
I don't trust, can't trust and don't believe that theres a decent guy out there anymore.